I don't know you ....

"Je ne vous connais pas!"

We have lived in this region for seven and a half years and are still piercing the mysteries of the mentality and the culture of its inhabitants. A friend told me the following story :

C married into our town. One fine summer's day, she took her young daughter to the local swimming hole made by damming up the river. The girl had a great time in the water and found a little playmate her age. Near afternoon tea time, C invited the mother of the little playmate to come to their house, not far away, to share afternoon tea. C wanted to get to know other mothers in the area and to create a friendship network. So she was not only surprised, but hurt to hear the other mother refuse her invitation point blank.
"Why ?" she wanted to know.
"Because I don't know you !" replied the other.

This incident provided an important insight into the way people are here. Historically very isolated, in a fairly difficult agricultural context, marked by centuries of different conflicts from the Wars of the Religions (Catholics against Protestants) to the Resistance fighters during the Second World War, these people are independent, suspicious of outsiders, and very loyal towards their family. They will only trust those they grew up with. So they will only let you into their lives if you are already part of them !
 "I don't know you !" means 'you don't come from here, you are not part of my family, I can't trust you.' It means 'I'm not about to take time to get to know you' and 'I don't feel the need to get to know you'. It blocks out outsiders : better the devil you know than the one you don't.